Tumblr is now for toddlers? No sex, no latex, no fucking around. Don’t even look for it

A curious thing has happened with the blogging network and digital scrapbook for the younger generation known as Tumblr: it’s now squeaky clean. (Unless you know the magic trick) Tumblr has quietly, stealthily altered it’s search engine so that by default if there is any racy content, you won’t be able to find it. Maybe they have their reasons but for we adults that sometimes use it—it smacks of censorship, cowardliness, and puritan bullshit. Here’s what happened today when I tried a few terms at random, after reading the post of Ancilla Tilia, a friend, fetish fashion model, writer, troublemaker, censorship critic, citizen privacy advocate, and activist for Holland’s Pirate Party. I don’t know why it happened or what Tumblr has to say about it but it pissed me off enough to write this long scrawl. Because if there is one thing the world doesn’t need more of, it’s stupid censorship and priggish morality. (Oops, that’s two things, but they usually go together—like a Happy Meal set.) Let’s show how the new and improved search (censor) function works.

"Latex" Yes, fetish models wear it, so it must be obscene. Goodbye Latex!

“Latex”
Yes, fetish models wear it, so it must be obscene. Goodbye Latex!

    So clearly latex is bad because it might lead to deviant sex. But what about sex?

Screenshot 2014-09-04 14.22.58

Sex. What could be more obscene! Let’s get rid of that as well. Hmm…should we leave “gender”. Ask Tumblr!

Maybe “sex” is too crude. How about some discourse on “sexual intercourse?”

Sexual intercourse--the process from which we are born, including the corporate shills who run Tumblr. Nope, that's gone too. Could we have a discussion about it? Somehow, I think "sexual discourse" would probably be banned as well. No more sex for you Tumblr kids.

Sexual intercourse–the process from which we are born, including the corporate shills who run Tumblr. Nope, that’s gone too. Could we have a discussion about it? Somehow, I think “sexual discourse” would probably be banned as well. No more sex for you Tumblr kids.

By now, you’d guess “The F Word” would not show any results, and you know what–you’re right.

Who gives a fuck?  Apparently, Tumblr does. No more fucking around. WTF?

Who gives a fuck?
Apparently, Tumblr does. No more fucking around. WTF?

Yes, a new dim day has dawned on one of the last free blogging sites. But it doesn’t mean we still can’t have some good clean fun on the platform.

Tumblr's search function has been castrated and now it's like a blogging platform for toddlers. Forgive me for being childish about this wave of censorship, but seriously Tumblr, f@ck you.

Tumblr’s search function has been castrated and now it’s like a blogging platform for toddlers. Forgive me for being childish about this wave of censorship, but seriously Tumblr, f@ck you.

Thanks Ms.Tilia for bringing this to our attention.

On a pirate expedition, internet activist Ancilla Tilia discovered that Tumblr has had it's balls stolen.

On a pirate expedition, internet activist Ancilla Tilia discovered that Tumblr has had it’s balls stolen. *image from retecool.com

If you successfully take over the good ship Tumblr, please release the search terms back into the wild. Ahoy Matey!  And Tumblr, f@ck you. PS. As a gentle reader kindly informed me after posting this, when you search and don’t find the “adult” stuff, look for a tiny lock in the upper right corner of the page. Press it and buried treasure will be found.  Arghh.

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